Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissy fit and a

conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.



_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,

peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."

_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of

"yonder."

_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, ... as in: "Going

to town, be back directly."

_____

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request

for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl

in the middle of the table.

_____

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use

the term, but they know the concept well.

_____

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for

a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl

of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also

know to add a large banana puddin!

_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near"

and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can

be 1 mile or 20.

_____

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a

redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.

_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn

signal is actually going to make a turn.

_____

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

____



Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're "in

line," ... we talk to everybody!

_____

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related,

even if only by marriage.

_____

In the South, y'all is singular, .... all y'all is plural.

_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are

perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that

fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.

_____

When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you

are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!



_____

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates

the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened.

"Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.

_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who

drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.

_____

To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!

_____



And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff,.. bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!

_____

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all

y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."

Ok everyone. I went to my interview today. They don't have any assistant mgr positions open, but instead are considering me for a shift manager job. *dances around* Before I got home from my first interview, they had called the house, scheduling a second interview for tomorrow!!! It will be SOOO nice to actually WORK! *sighs contentedly*

The kids are doing good. Corey got stung yesterday by a wasp. Fortunately, he isn't like his father, so all I needed to do was clean it and put some baking soda on it. Poor guy.

Leanne has figured out how to get up in the rocking chair and make it rock. It's pretty cute to watch her.

I haven't talked to Donnie since last week, so I don't know what's going on with him. Maybe he'll call tomorrow.

By the way, my cell phone is back up, so if any of you need to get ahold of me, you know how.

That's it for tonight. Take care, and until later!